If you watched the above trailer, then you can see why I would have some problems trying to describe this oddity. If I were to whittle it down to its simplest form, I would say that “House” is about a group of Japanese schoolgirls who take a vacation in a haunted house. But that would be like saying “The Rocky Horror Picture Show” is just a movie about a couple who get lost, or “Donnie Darko” is about a plane crash. There is so much going on within this movie that the story takes a backseat to the open hand smack to eyes and ears it delivers. Imagine a live-action episode of Scooby-Doo directed by Dario Argento and Sam Raimi on the set of Sid & Marty Kroft’s H.R. Puff ‘n’ Stuff. If you can do this, then you have gotten a fairly good idea of what to expect from “House”.
Oshare (Japanese for gorgeous) has her summer vacation ruined when her father informs her that his new girlfriend will be accompanying them on their planned trip. Oshare gets pretty upset with the news and tells them that she isn’t going and that they can both kiss her ass. Lucky for her that her best friends from school have also had their vacation plans ruined. They decide that they will all spend the summer at Oshare’s elderly Aunt’s large home in the country. Little do Oshare and her friends Fantasy, Sweet, Prof, Melody, Kung Fu, and Mac know that there is something sinister going on in that house and Oshare’s aunt wants the young girls to come visit for nefarious reasons. Strange things begin happening immediately upon their arrival and one-by-one the girls begin disappearing, some being dispatched in ironic ways. The remaining girls try to escape the house with their lives and eventually engage in a final battle with the evil Auntie and her haunted house of minions.
“House” was released in 1977 but until now the only way you could watch it was a German subtitled DVD. Now US audiences will have a chance to experience this film as Janus Films has released an English subtitled print that is currently mingling in the film festival circuit. On top of that, it is getting a theatrical run in a small number of US theaters (full release schedule). What this means is that you are probably gonna hear more about this film as the buzz begins growing. But is it living up to all the hype? Is it — as the Independent Film Channel has asked in a recent article — the ultimate Midnight Movie? How about this, take a look at this picture:
Awesome pic ain’t it? It’s like looking at the boy scout on Oingo Boingo’s “Only A Lad” album cover. Or the chick yelling ‘Ride ’em cowboy!” to the man about to have sex with the cross-eyed Asian chick who just shot a beer can out of his hand in Devo’s “Whip It” video. It’s kinda surreal yet still makes some sort of sense. Barely. Contradictions abound in “House” and when you are not witness to a Japanese schoolgirl smiling while holding the severed head of her friend with a sunset backdrop, you’ll witness Melody laughing as she is eaten by a piano or watch one schoolgirl pick up the panties of another and remark on how they stink after she sniffs them. It’s because of these odd, mash-up of styles often co-existing together on the screen at the same time that make “House” hard to label. A psychedelic haunted house fantasy comedy horror movie? Sure, why not. But to really hammer it home, check out this scene from the film:
I wanted you to watch that before going any further because that video clip alone should easily explain this movie better than I can and divide you into two, well defined groups. One group will read no further as they have no desire to watch shit like this. The other, much cooler group will be doing whatever they can to get their hands on a copy. The funny thing is that the piano scene isn’t even the craziest thing that happens in the film, but it is a great example of all the different camera effects Obayashi uses throughout “House”. I mean this guy uses EVERYTHING that was available in 1977. Stop-motion, matte, puppets, and even hand-drawing effects directly on the celluloid – and not always just during the action sequences. And while your eyeballs are getting beaten to a pulp by the “Evil Dead” style effects, your ears are being verbally assaulted by a cornucopia of sound bites ranging from children laughing, wind blowing, bells ringing and babies crying.
The only issue I had with the entire film was that later in the final act, as the film ramps up the overall looniness, there is so much crazy shit is going on it is hard to figure out exactly what is going on. Not that it really matters much as once the dismembered legs of a schoolgirl karate a kick a cat painting making it puke so much blood that it floods a room — well, all logic kinda goes right out the window. There was also the issue of me feeling a bit more like a Dirty Old Man than normal as Obayashi shows a couple of the young cast partially naked at certain times. Not that I am a prude as I promote nudity whole-heartedly (with some of you). It may be cultural differences or something, but we are all aware of the stigma the Japanese have with their love of schoolgirls, underwear and tentacle porn and I couldn’t help but sense some sexual undertones at times. Hell, one scene of a girl wearing a dress being attacked by sheets is shot from under the floor looking up. Even so, it is all presented as innocently as a pillow fight between early teens in their underwear (Giggity!) and never in any type of sexual manner. I’m just pointing it out as it’s another aspect of the film that made it a bit weirder than it was already.
“House” is definitely one of those movies that is best experienced rather than described and I do hope that it makes into the Midnight Movie stable of films. I could not think of a better example of a film tailor made for that venue. But I will tell you that before the end credits, the viewer will have witnessed talking, decapitated heads biting girl’s asses, paintings that spit blood, cannibalism, nubile nudity, dancing skeletons, magic cats, dismembered legs performing kung-fu, a man being turned into bananas, killer pillows, melon fetishes, magic cats, gold fish eating, sepia toned war-time flashbacks, killer household appliances and an amazing showdown that involves the most badass lampshade ever seen in a film. So if any of that sounds intriguing to you, then welcome to “House”. I promise that you will enjoy your stay. I’m giving “House” four dancing skeletons out of five.
[rating:4/5]
This article was written by Morbid for The Dreamin Demon - the Internet's self-appointed buzzkill.
